It is difficult to know when a relation to arrived at its aim. When the problems are repeated we must continue trying it? When we can know that the best thing is the separation? The reflection of four questions can help us to decide to us. Antigamente, the main function of the relations of even was the one to procreate and to construct a family, nowadays, is but important the personal experience that we lived in the pair life. Before, the continuity of the relation was assured would pass what happened, many people have had to hold stormy situations because thus tapeworm that to be, nowadays even continues happening although in many less cases. At present no longer the social pressure exists that impedia the dissolution of a pair or a marriage. Nevertheless, a series of values exists that indirectly influence in the mentality of the members of a pair and condition the healthful development of the same.
We live in a society oriented to the consumption and the search on the new thing, a society in certain infantilizada way. In the relations also we looked for fast benefits, in the short term and with little personal investment. That is to say, as if outside a company, if we do not obtain succulent immediate affective benefits we happened to another relation of the same form that disolveriamos the company. A divorce express would be the solution, the problem is that in the future we will return to repeat the errors with this mentality. First of all, we must accept that it is not enough with loving, sometimes two people can be very safe of its feelings towards the other, but they cannot make agree its vital projects. To stop forcing the reality so that both can exert calm and peacefully with itself is a challenge to surpass.
Secondly, it agrees to know where this the limit that differentiate the conducts and attitudes that allow to undergo the conflict like productive from which they are harmful for the relation. Thirdly, it is necessary to consider that exists three elements, ” t” , ” yo” , and the relation. Each must both take the responsibilities from itself and from the relation. One cannot only solve the problems that are incumbent on both. It will be able echarselos to hills, but not to solve them. The last aspect to consider is like feeling us we before them needs that the pair indicates to us. It is not necessary to do everything what our pair wants that we do if we did not feel comfortable in the situation, this in the end would end up passing invoice, is necessary to put certain limits. Podriamos to say then that when the vital projects are not compatible, when the limits of the respect are surpassed, when we remained single fighting by a relation or when we cannot accept the needs of our pair, perhaps has arrived the moment for putting point and end to a relation.